Change.

Dang it. Why do you have you creep up in my thoughts. You creep in and I don't even notice until its too late to get you out.
So what if I said I miss you?
I've lied about not missing you. If I make everyone else believe the lie, maybe I'll believe it too.
I could need you right now. I'm going through the hardest thing I've ever been through, but where are you? You said you'd be here. I know you can't be here, but that doesn't mean I don't want you here.
Or.
Maybe I don't really want you here. Maybe I'm tricking myself into thinking I need you here.
Is it really you I want? I. Don't. Know.
I'm clueless.
There are days that I could just run and hug you.
There are days I never want to talk to you again.
There are days where can't see me without you.
There are days when I can see me without you.
There are days, like today, when I'm totally confused and don't know what to think.
There are days when everything is clear and I know just what to do.

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